i'm done

I'm glad Sammy's ok, but for my own sanity...I think I'm done. ='(

...even just logging in here, my password is deancas1224 -  all my passwords are deancas1224 - this is so painful.

--possibly just an emotional over-reaction to losing Cas again, but I don't think I can handle it this time. I've stopped watching before, but never like this.

7.17 SPOILERS

"When he and the boys see each other, it's not like, 'Oh, Sam and Dean!' 'Oh, Castiel!' It's amnesia of sorts," Padalecki previews.

I'm wrong, Cas has amnesia and I hate life. I need a drink...

a look back...

I have waaaayy too much time on my hands up in booth and I'm obviously still not over the finale...this is what happens when all I want is to ease the pain and given the time to reflect.

Dean
  s.1 - hooked from the beginning, but didn't think too much on it in fear of losing him.
♥s.2 - let myself fall for him and he trades his life for Sammy's
  s.3 - they take him away from me. Dean goes to Hell.

I'm the one who gripped you tight and raised you from perdition...

Cas
   s.4(1) - hooked from the beginning, but didn't think too much on it in fear of losing him.
 ♥s.5(2) - let myself fall for him and he abandons Dean in favor of Heaven.
   s.6(3) - they take him away from me. Cas' grace is trapped in Purgatory. (theory)

...are you sensing the pattern here?

Following my theory, I think Death should send Dean to Purgatory to save Cas...might make for a nice fic, but my writing ability was lost long ago

This is the bref version of my epiphany, more detailed under the cut: